So, Megan Fox has been kicked off of Transformers 3, or as her reps would have it, she has decided not to do it.  Regardless of who was the one ultimately pulling the trigger here (and my odds are Director Michael Bay as the one who made the decision first), this is a sign that Megan Fox clearly doesn’t want a career in acting.

I don’t like to have to comment on something like this.  My opinion is just that, and I can only assume that working with Bay can be a painstaking process to say the least. I know people that know him very well, and I am fairly comfortable with the notion that he is an ego-maniac.  That being said, the man is a success, so an actor is typically not smart to get on his bad side.  Especially one as “accomplished” as Fox.  Since Megan has routinely put her foot in her own mouth in the press, she has to be largely the one to blame here.  Michael giveth her an opportunity, and he taketh away.

Looks can only take an actress so far. Transforming robots can take them farther.

I know she has Jonah Hex coming up, which looks surprisingly good thus far, but after that what can she count on?  I suspect Fox thought she was better than the production and despite the number of rumors out there (Bay wanted her to tan too much; Bay made her self-conscious and kept her thin), everything ultimately is tantamount to an excuse.  Her loss is another actresses gain.  Good move or bad on Megan’s part? Or do you side with Bay’s decision here?

This film, Jennifer’s Body has a lot of expectations riding on it. Especially for its writer, Diablo Cody, and star Megan Fox. For Cody, this film marks her first script since winning a Best Original Screenplay Oscar for 2007’s Juno. With Jennifer’s Body, she has to prove to everyone that she is not a one-hit wonder. Star Megan Fox is out to prove that she can carry a film, while also proving that her acting abilities extend beyond wearing tight clothes and talking to robots, as she did in the two Transformers films. Does either woman prove themselves worthy of their almost overnight success? For me, the answer would have to be no.

The plot for this high school-meets-horror film surrounds the title character Jennifer (Megan Fox) and her best friend Anita “Needy” Lesnicky (Amanda Seyfried). These two characters have been friends since they were young girls, even though they are polar opposites, Needy is the nerdy one and Jennifer is the hottest, most popular girl in the entire town. The reason behind their enduring friendship, we are told through Needy’s voice over, is “sandbox love never dies.”

The events of the film are put in motion when one night Jennifer decides to drag Needy away from her boyfriend, Chip (Johnny Simmons), and go to their town’s only bar, to see her favorite band, “Low Shoulder.”  As Jennifer tries to attract the attention of the band’s lead singer, Nikolai Wolf (Adam Brody), the bar catches on fire, and after Jennifer and Needy escape to the parking lot, the band convinces Jennifer to get in their van. Needy is left wandering what has happened to her BFF until Jennifer shows up hours later at Needy’s house, covered in blood. Jennifer says nothing and only vomits up an inky, black liquid before leaving.

Needy routinely got frustrated when Jennifer failed to make the bed.

The next day at school, Jennifer is seemingly fine and mentions nothing of the previous night’s events. Something however, is terribly wrong with her, as she was the victim of a botched satanic sacrifice by her favorite band (they mistook her for a virgin) and becomes possessed by a demon. This is a demon that requires human flesh to survive and soon the town’s teenage male population begins to disappear. It’s up to Needy to stop Jennifer before she consumes the entire male population of Devil’s Kettle, Minnesota.

The film’s dialogue is signature Diablo Cody, everyone speaks in a hyper-witty, sarcastic tone that anyone who saw Juno will know as soon as they hear it. The problem with Jennifer’s Body, unlike Juno, is that the dialogue that was fresh and fun then - sounds forced here.  It seems Cody is trying too hard to make the film funny and quirky, and it doesn’t work. The dialogue isn’t done any favors by Megan Fox who, while delivering some decent lines, doesn’t add any emotion behind her delivery. I think Fox, who has complained so much to the press about not being able to show her true talent, was proven wrong. I’m now certain we have already seen her range as an actress with the Transformers series.

Fire. It does a body good.

It also didn’t help Fox look any more capable by putting her opposite Amanda Seyfried (Mamma Mia!). Seyfried proves that she is miles above Megan Fox in the acting department by putting in the film’s only genuine performance as the heroine of the movie. The rest of the cast is decent with J.K. Simmons’ comedic talents going to waste in such a small part. The only other notable performance besides Seyfried, is Adam Brody’s comedic cameo as the band’s lead singer.

The films biggest offense however, is its tone. It’s never clear what the film is trying to be. It has elements of horror, but is neither scary nor gory enough to be considered a horror film. It isn’t a comedy, as it doesn’t feature enough laughs to be in that genre. Lastly, it can’t be considered a teen sex comedy either, as contrary to what the film’s publicity and its premise would have you believe, the film features no nudity. The sexual elements are rather PG-13 (sorry, Fox fans).

In the end, the film’s muddled tone really brings the whole thing down. It can’t decide what it wants to be, and it fails for this reason. If “Body” falters at the box office – I’m sure Megan Fox will continue to get roles with her looks alone and Cody will continue to write scripts – I just hope next time she brings something new to offer and doesn’t try to replicate her Juno dialogue again.  Jennifer’s Body is not a true disaster, but it lacks any real soul.

Michael Bay’s Transformers movies have made Megan Fox a household name.  The films put her in the spotlight and in the minds of countless red blooded teens as well as movie fans and media alike.  However, Megan hadn’t really been making nice over her time with Michael, referring to Bay as “Hitler” recently.  Something that should never come off of one’s lips lightly.  She has routinely commented on how the films require little acting, but rather are simply about running around in skimpy outfits and dodging imaginary robots.  Her loose lips have made her very quotable in the media, but have angered more than a few, including those associated with the filming of the Transformers films.  Source: MichaelBay.com

Three crew members from the set of the movies have recently had enough and they posted a rant about her, which has since been taken down, but luckily, we have the full note here for you.  The letter had originally been posted to Bay’s official website, but Michael took it down and said:

“I don’t condone the crew letter to Megan. And I don’t condone Megan’s outlandish quotes. But her crazy quips are part of her crazy charm. The fact of the matter I still love working with her, and I know we still get along. I even expect more crazy quotes from her on Transformers 3.“

Oh, Michael, when did we arrive at a point in time where he seems to be the level headed one?  Here is the scathing read which includes portions about Megan being  “a thankless, classless, graceless, unfriendly bitch” as well as “dumb as a rock.”  Good times!  Enjoy the letter, I am sure you will have some reactions.

This is an open letter to all Michael Bay fans. We are three crew members that have worked with Michael for the past ten years. Last week we read the terrible article with inflammatory, truly trashing quotes by the Ms. Fox about Michael Bay. This letter is to set a few things straight.

Yes, Megan has great eyes, a tight stomach we spray with glycerin, and an awful silly Marilyn Monroe tattoo plastered on her arm that we cover up to keep the moms happy.

Michael found this shy, inexperienced girl, plucked her out of total obscurity thus giving her the biggest shot of any young actresses’ life. He told everyone around to just trust him on his choice. He granted her the starring role in Transformers, a franchise that forever changed her life; she became one of the most googled and oogled women on earth. She was famous! She was the next Angelina Jolie, hooray! Wait a minute, two of us worked with Angelina – second thought – she’s no Angelina. You see, Angelia is a professional.

We know this quite intimately because we’ve had the tedious experience of working with the dumb-as-a-rock Megan Fox on both Transformers movies. We’ve spent a total of 12 months on set making these two movies.

We are in different departments; we can’t give our names because sadly doing so in Hollywood could lead to being banished from future Paramount work. One of us touches Megan’s panties, the other has the often shitty job of pulling Ms. Sour pants out of her trailer, while another is near the Panaflex camera that helps to memorialize the valley girl on film.

Megan has the press fooled. When we read those magazines we wish we worked with that woman. Megan knows how to work her smile for the press. Those writers should try being on set for two movies, sadly she never smiles. The cast, crew and director make Transformers a really fun and energetic set. We’ve traveled around the world together, so we have never understood why Megan was always such – the grump of the set?

When facing the press, Megan is the queen of talking trailer trash and posing like a porn star. And yes we’ve had the unbearable time of watching her try to act on set, and yes, it’s very cringe-able. So maybe, being a porn star in the future might be a good career option. But make-up beware, she has a paragraph tattooed to her backside (probably due her rotten childhood) easily another 45 minutes in the chair!

So when the three of us caught wind of Ms Fox, pontificating yet again in some publication (like she actually has something interesting to say) blabbing her trash mouth about a director whom we three have grown to really like. She compared working with Michael, to “working with Hitler”. We actually don’t think she knows who Hitler is by the way. But we wondered how she doesn’t realize what a disgusting, fully uneducated comment this was? Well, here let’s get some facts straight.

Say what you want about Michael – yes at times he can be hard, but he’s also fun, and he challenges everyone for a reason – he simply wants people to bring their ‘A’ game. He comes very prepared, knows exactly what he wants, involves the crew and expects everyone to follow through with his or her best, and that includes the actors. He’s one of the hardest working directors out there.

He gets the best from his crews, many of whom have worked with him for 15 years. And yes, he’s loyal, one of the few directors we’ve encountered who lowered his fee by millions to keep Transformers in the United States and California, so he could work with his own crew.

Megan says that Transformers was an unsafe set? Come on Megan, we know it is a bit more strenuous then the playground at the trailer park, but you don’t insult one of the very best stunt and physical effects teams in the business! Not one person got hurt!

And who is the real Megan Fox? She is very different than the academy nominee and winning actors we’ve all worked around. She’s as about ungracious a person as you can ever fathom. She shows little interest in the crew members around her. We work to make her look good in every way, but she’s absolutely never appreciative of anyone’s hard work. Never a thank you. All the crewmembers have stopped saying hi to Ms. Princess because she never says hello back. It gets tiring. Many think she just really hates the process of being an actress.

Megan has been late to the sets many times. She goes through the motions that make her exude this sense of misery. We’ve heard the A.D’s piped over the radio that Megan won’t walk from her trailer until John Turturro walks first! John’s done seventy-five movies and she’s made two!

Never expect Megan to attend any of the 15 or so crew parties like all the other actors have. And then there’s the classless night she blew off The Royal Prince of Jordan who made a special dinner for all the actors. She doesn’t know that one of the grips daughters wanted to visit their daddy’s work to meet Megan, but he wouldn’t let them come because he told them “she is not nice.”

The press certainly doesn’t know her most famous line. On our first day in Egypt, the Egyptian government wouldn’t let us shoot because of a permit problem as the actors got ready in make up at the Four Seasons Hotel. Michael tried to make the best of it; he wanted to take the cast and crew on a private tour of the famous Giza pyramids. God hold us witness, Megan said, “I can’t believe Michael is fucking forcing us to go to the fucking pyramids!” I guess this is the “Hitler guy” she is referring to.

So this is the Megan Fox you don’t get to see. Maybe she will learn, but we figure if she can sling insults, then she can take them too. Megan really is a thankless, classless, graceless, and shall we say unfriendly bitch. It’s sad how fame can twist people, and even sadder that young girls look up to her. If only they knew who they’re really looking up to.

But ‘Fame’ is fleeting. We, being behind the scenes, seen em’ come and go. Hopefully Michael will have Megatron squish her character in the first ten minutes of Transformers 3. We can tell you that will make the crew happy!

I am not foolish enough to think that this doesn’t exist on countless film sets.  There is jealousy and envy everywhere.  That being said, I think that for this letter to make it to any form of print shows just how much contempt there must be f or Fox.  These are the types of things that in old Hollywood you would read about years later in a memoir about a successful film or individual.  I am surprised that something this slanted would be written, so I guess Megan has her detractors.  React.

For the past couple of years, Megan Fox has been one of the hottest things to walk on God’s green Earth. Since Transformers, she literally has been the biggest image of the movie, even more than the Transformers themselves. Despite all of this, I want to say she’s not a very good actress. Of course the only two things I have ever seen her in have been the two Transformers films. Who is a good actress, though, is Amanda Seyfried, her co-star in the upcoming horror/comedy, Jennifer’s Body. She was terrific in Mama Mia! and had a good supporting role in Alpha Dog. But, back to Fox. I feel it unfair to write her off as a “bad actress” when all I’ve seen her in is Transformers, as Michael Bay films obviously aren’t an actors’ haven. I think I need to see a few more movies of hers to make a conclusion. I would like to see her take on a challenging role or even take the indie route, but right now, Jennifer’s Body should be sufficient.

"I'd rather be out killing someone, than listening to this."

Fox stars as the title role, Jennifer Clark. Jennifer is the most beautiful girl in high school and every male wants a piece of her.  Naturally, she’s also a cheerleader.  One of her childhood friends is the polar opposite, nerdy friend, Anita “Needy” Lesnicky (Amanda Seyfried).  While attending a rock concert, Jennifer falls victim to a satanic ritual performed by the band in hopes of getting recognition for a record deal.  When the ritual goes awry, Jennifer is possessed by a demon. With Jennifer now evil, she begins to lure boys near her for the purpose of killing them.  Anita is suspicious of Jennifer’s evil behavior and must find a way to stop her before her killing spree extends to all the high school boys.

The movie also co-stars J.K. Simmons (I Love You, Man and a favorite of mine), Johnny Simmons (The Spirit) and Adam Brody (Thank You For Smoking). Karyn Kusama directs Jennifer’s Body, who has also directed Girlfight (starring my favorite actress, Michelle Rodriguez) and Aeon Flux.  The screenplay was written by Diablo Cody, who recently won an Academy Award for Best Original Screenplay for Juno.

The lake-ness monster.

As I stated in the past, I like horror movies and I think this one looks pretty sweet.  An Academy Award winner in Cody writing it is the most important aspect.  It’s just up to Fox and Kusama to make it happen. It does have a good supporting cast with Seyfried and Simmons so I think this will turn out well.  Plus, it brings in the comedic aspect, which is always a plus in my book. It will probably be in a similar vein to Drag Me to Hell, and it looks like it pays homage to Sam Raimi as Fox wears an Evil Dead t-shirt in the trailer. This should do well since Fox is a big name and I’m sure every male can’t get enough of her.  I’ll probably see this because I like Seyfried and I want to see Simmons working from another Cody script, since he was really funny in Juno. Plus, I actually want to see Fox do well and change my current opinion of her. But, I’m also one of those males who wants to see her for the visual factor, too.

Jennifer’s Body opens September 18^th.

This week in the web’s original Movie Poster Round-Up, we have all sorts of bigger name, anticipated films with one-sheets for you.  One of our best yet, no doubt.  We start with a few early posters for Prince of Persia with Jake Gyllenhaal and Gemma Atherton.  We also have the first poster that has emerged for the latest in the horror series of Saw with Saw VI.  The Saw franchise usually has some real nice posters, but this one is a weaker effort based on the bar they have set.  Not horrible, but they’ve been very good throughout time.  We can assume you saw the Saw VI Motion Poster from earlier in the week, if not, be sure to do so.  We also have an additional Saw 6 poster, which is no better.

The Bronson poster finally got here.  Been wanting to see this movie but haven’t had the chance yet, courtesy of WAMG.  We have the brand new Shutter Island poster, Scorcese’s latest starring Leo DiCaprio.  A Nightmare on Elm Street has Jackie Earle Haley playing Mr. Kruger.  The teaser poster is below.  The new 2012 poster for the John Cusack led disaster flick looks reasonably good.  The city looks like a rock/glacier to me though, so kinda cheesy in that regard.  Good enough concept though.  The new Ninja Assassin poster is up.  We have the trailer which debuted this week too.  A hilarious The Cabin In The Woods one sheet appears courtesy of FusedFilm.

Arthur and The Vengeance of Malthazard is up next, followed by a pair of Fame posters.  I’m gonna live forever, by the way.  The sure to be controversial I Can Do Bad All By Myself poster is up, but any film buff knows that it is a direct rip-off of Straw Dogs art, which featured a broken glassed Dustin Hoffman.  In poor taste?  Straw Dogs is getting remade by the way.  John Romita Jr. drew the Kick-Ass movie poster, for you comic fans. Then comes Vintner’s Luck, since we debuted the trailer recently as well. We also have a legit version of Jonah Hex with Josh Brolin and Megan Fox, which made the rounds at Comic-Con in cameraphone form but looks better here.  Supposedly Megan has a small role in the film, but she managed to make this one-sheet. Thanks to IMP Awards for all their help.

When I said Jennifer’s Body in the title of this post, I am reminded that we gave you past updates on Megan Fox with her scary pic from a previous post, the movie poster in an earlier round-up and now we give you a few more images from the film that I am guessing you won’t want to miss.  The horror-comedy written by Juno screenwriter Diablo Cody is scheduled to hit theaters on September 18th.  Here are a brief synopsis and then the images.  Yes, this is hard-hitting journalism at it’s finest.  You can thank me later, Chuck.

When small-town high school hottie Jennifer (Megan Fox) is possessed by a hungry demon, guys who never stood a chance with her, take on new luster in the light of Jennifer’s insatiable appetite. From the Oscar-winning screenwriter of “Juno.”

The last two caps, courtesy of HorrorMovies.ca. Thanks.

Megan Fox.  Her name alone gets the heart of many red-blooded boys and men thumping.  Images of fanciful delights tempt and torture the mind.  One might recall her GQ photo shoot pics, or the behind the scenes topless shots that have been splattered across gossip sites.  Us?  Well we have to keep it about movies.  So we follow Fox in Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen or her work in the upcoming Jennifer’s Body.  Which brings us to the post.  Here is an image you probably never wanted to see.  That’s Megan Fox, looking worse than Charlize Theron did for Monster, in full make-up after feasting on her prey in the upcoming horror-comedy.  I might get nightmares just thinking about it.  At the same time, the power of Fox at the moment is such that she gets a whole post to herself, just to show you a picture.  That might even be scarier.  Enjoy, if you dare, the fanged Fox, courtesy of Fangoria.  Check back tomorrow for a new one-sheet of her from the Jennifer’s Body movie in our renowned Movie Poster Round-Up.

Read our preview of the film here.

Giant transforming robots have been a part of my life for as long as I can remember. The “Transformers” animated TV series began when I was but two years old. The animated film, when I was four, elicited tears when I witnessed the death of Optimus Prime. I had so many metallic and plastic vehicle/robot hybrids, I became adept at calling them out even as they remained behind my preschool teacher’s back. I was even apparently known for yelling, “Transformers,” when released for kindergarten recess. My long forgotten childhood came rushing back to me in 2007 with the release of Michael Bay’s live-action Transformers and it was the one film that year I just knew would live up to the hype. Sadly, it turned out only about half-true. Apathetic was more the applicable word than disappointed and my view remained that way regarding the impending release of Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen. With expectations tempered, could the sequel to my boyhood dreams make up for the first installment?

Ever since Sam Witwicky shoved the all-spark cube into Megatron’s chest, rendering him lifeless and having the U.S. military drop the leader of the Decepticons into the ocean, Optimus Prime and the Autobots have remained alongside the human race as protectors against any future enemy attack. A new national security advisor to the president isn’t the biggest fan of the new militaristic advisors and accuses them of withholding weapons technology secrets and increasing the chances of Decepticon attack merely by their presence. His aim is to rid the Transformers from Earth, if only to maintain his developed ego.

Meanwhile, Sam is now in a committed relationship with Mikaela, but he’s attempting to retain a normal life after discovery of an alien race, by moving on to college. Mikaela can’t afford the college life and thus remains in their hometown working at a motorcycle shop and keeping an eye on her recently-out-of-prison father. Sam discovers a sliver of the all-spark didn’t make it all the way into Megatron’s chest and instead causes some trouble at home. He hands the sliver to Mikaela for safe-keeping, but while at school he suffers a mental breakdown, seeing and drawing foreign symbols as a result of previously touching the all-spark.

Hidden deep inside the ocean alongside Megatron’s remains lies the title character, The Fallen. He’s one of the earliest Transformers, encountering Earth back in 17,000 B.C. Unfortunately for the rest of the world, he’s a Decepticon and ever since being banished to the seas, he’s been awaiting his revenge on the human race. When the Decepticons get word of Sam seeing alien images and still possessing a piece of the all-spark, they make it their mission to hunt him down and strip him of the information trapped inside his mind. Such a result will give The Fallen a chance to rise and Decepticons another chance at taking control of Earth.

Devastator dwarfs the competition.

One of the massive problems I had with Bay’s first venture into the world of Autobots and Decepticons was the cheesy humor. Bumblebee pees on John Turturro, Autobots try to hide in suburbia and Wheelie attempts to inconspicuously shield his face from anybody who might recognize him. It seemed out of place in a giant robot movie and put a damper on all of the “Bayhem” released. Sadly, Revenge of the Fallen is an even worse offender. Dogs hump legs, mothers go on pot benders and two new Autobots make Dopey from Snow White and the Seven Dwarves look like Stephen Hawking. Frankly, it was embarrassing to sit there and watch how these things play out onscreen. The sad thing is that it’s all completely unnecessary, because during tense, action-oriented moments the film sustains itself perfectly well.

While the “humor” weighed this film down more than the original, Bay managed to improve his directorial style this time around. He’s always been known for the ADD-style editing with no shot ever lasting longer than a beat or two, but he didn’t help his cutting technique when the majority of his robotic in-fighting shots were obscured by other pieces of the set. This could very well have been done to make the job easier on special effects house ILM, but it made it difficult for the viewer to follow the action and make out just who was who. Thankfully, the intrusive objects have been removed and the audience now has a better semblance of the action taking place. Although why the choice to make Decepticon leaders Megatron and Starscream both gun-metal gray fighter planes, I’ve no idea.

The film is complete spectacle, only compounded when projected on the IMAX format. Bay shot two action scenes, one in a lush green forest and the other near the pyramids of Egypt with IMAX cameras, and the scenes have a magnificent pop to them. The detail is startling and works as a perfect device for which to display meta-Transformer, Devastator, made up five individual Decepticons. The film works at a massive volume, both visually and aurally, which is perfect for intensity in the action, but only makes the transition to scenes of pure human interaction more jarring.

Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen delivers in its promise of giant fighting robots, but sadly believes more is needed for which to draw the viewer into the world. The human relationships are canned at best and attempts draw in the child crowd like Star Wars: Episode I – The Phantom Menace works just about as well as that film. IMAX is certainly the only format for which to see the film, as the visuals provided are glorious. The film is the latest case in style over substance and its only hope for a redemptive inevitable third outing is to drop the “funny” business and remember the robots are what we’re here for. A boy can still dream, can’t he?